How Do They Survive?

I now measure success by the number of bruises or injuries Noah has at the end of the day. The smaller the number of injuries, the more successful I feel. I am proud of myself when I put him to bed and he only has one protruding bump on his head or one scratch on his face. When he has 2 protruding bumps on his head, one scratch on his arm, one red rug burn on his face, a tweaked ankle, and a scraped knee, I feel like I should be fired from being a mommy. Today...I should have been fired! He did a "Superman" (as my husband called it) down the slide on the playground. Apparently he fell head first down the slide which gave him a nice red burn on his cheek and on his knee. He fell off the step stool in the kitchen and tweaked his ankle. He slipped in the shower and bumped his head and he smashed his finger while opening and closing drawers. How are my kids going to make it past age 1? Do all kids get injured this much or do I really deserve to get fired?