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Friday, March 25, 2011

Letter From the Retail Clerk at Motherhood Maternity That I Am Expecting in the Mail

Dear Mrs. Murray,

I am afraid that our store will no longer be able to welcome you and your children after your visit on Friday. Although, we do appreciate your business, the list of things that we do NOT appreciate far exceeds the profits we made off the 2 nursing bras you purchased.

*We did not appreciate your son's opening of the dressing room door as you tried on clothes. I am sure our guests and employees alike are scarred for life.
*We did not appreciate his loud questions regarding your body that the whole store could hear as you tried on your items.
*We did not appreciate your loud shushing and yell whispering threats. In fact we are contemplating putting in a call to CPS after hearing you threaten to make your 2 year old daughter sit in the car by herself while you shopped.
*We did not appreciate your kids running wild in the store hiding under all our clothing racks causing clothes to fall on the floor.
*We did not appreciate how slowly you waddled to find them and get them to stop.
*We did not appreciate your daughter knocking down our huge window display. Those are extremely cumbersome to put up and although I tried really hard to keep my cool, I am sure you noticed my intense irritation when this occurred.
*We did not appreciate your daughter screaming and crying at the top of her lungs for 5 minutes straight while I rang you up. I found myself almost giving you your items for free just so that you would get out of the store with your brood.

I am sorry to inform you that we do NOT want to know how much worse it could get once you have that third child. Please choose another store for your maternity needs.

The Nice Clerk Lady at Motherhood Maternity

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