Yesterday morning I had to get myself and my two kids ready for family pictures by 9:00. This was a daunting task...one that I was not looking forward to. I made out my minute by minute schedule and also prepared a Plan B. However, it turns out I should have had a Plan C; a plan of action in the case of a "floater."
I woke up, got myself half ready...you know, half dressed, partial make-uped, and semi-blow dried when the kids called for me to come get them out of bed. I got them out of bed, fed them breakfast, and coaxed them into the bath tub. I was proud of how efficient I was in getting them soaped and rinsed. Just as I was patting myself on the back for my efficiency, Maia gave me a pained look, and grunted "poooop." "NOOOO," I scream! I had just put shampoo on my hands and I felt paralyzed for a second. For some reason my first instinct was to put the shampoo in her hair to get it off my hands before grabbing her out of the bath. In hindsight I should have just picked her up as fast as I could and put her on the toilet. Well, I didn't do that and in the time it took to rid my hands of the shampoo, Maia had made a nice, solid, green deposit into the bath tub. Noah, reacted as though the Boogie Man had just jumped into the bath tub with him. He screamed and scooted as far away from the green deposit crying and yelling, "I DON'T LIKE POOP MOMMY! I DON'T LIKE POOP! GET IT OUT!" I quickly swooped my daughter out of the tub onto the toilet to no avail. In the midst of the lift she made more deposits onto the bathroom floor. None of the "stuff" made it into the toilet. I quickly fished out the floater and cleaned up the floor all the while willing my gag reflex to go away and thanking God that the deposit in the tub was indeed solid and in one piece. I had Noah drain the tub and I did a quick disinfectant wipe up of the tub while my kids stood wet, and freezing with soapy hair waiting to finish their bath.
My Plan A and Plan B did not make time for cleaning up poop, soothing my son from the traumatization of the "floater," and having to re-do my make-up, and re-dry my semi-dried hair due to the excessive sweating that had taken place during the whole ordeal. However, we did make it on time to our family photo shoot, but I am sure in all the pictures my face plainly says, "I had a very stressful morning."