Good Bye Unibrow

I think I am getting more hairy as I get older. Is that a symptom of aging? I always thought that you lose hair as you get older but not in my case. Yesterday, I went to get my eyebrows threaded. I am not very consistent in this, I usually get this done about every 2 to 4 months. In the meantime I have a very unsexy unibrow that I ignore. Well, yesterday I looked at myself in the mirror and decided that I wanted two eyebrows once agin. So I went to the threading place, sat in the chair and tensed my body up to prepare for the pain. Much to my dismay, I could feel the burning sensation caused by the yanking of each hair by its root throughout my forehead and along my temples. WHAT? I thought I only came to get my eyebrows done, not my entire face! At the rate she was going, I was sure I would be feeling the pain in my ears and my neck next. Sheesh...the pain that we women go through to remain presentable is absolutely crazy...and to think the pain only gets worse as we get older and the amount of hair increases is even crazier. I think I may re-think going for the "organic" look and spare myself the pain.

Noah's Newest Crush

I've discovered that Noah has a thing for talented women: First Carrie Underwood and now Natalya Radford. Natalya is one of the most talented worship leaders I have ever heard and I get the privelege of working with her and listening to her lead worship almost every week at our church. My little boy has been smitten with her ever since he first met her. He loves to go into "big church" and "praise Jesus" when Natalya leads worship. He turns to me after every song and says, "Natalya's not done yet." God forbid we walk out before she is done singing! Last week after giving him a guitar lesson, she gave him her guitar pick and this week he brought it back to show her that he had not lost it. It has seemed to become his routine to walk up on stage after church, sit on her guitar case, and recieve a guitar lesson from her. I have never seen him sit so still for such a long period of time. He is enthralled by Natalya and loves to learn all about the guitar and repeat the names of the different parts of it. She lets him strum the guitar with his pick and he gets a kick out of it. Yesterday, Pam captured some awesome pictures of their "guitar lesson." I had to steal the pictures and put them on my blog because they are so precious.

The After Party

Here is what my house looks like now thanks to my 2 year old's birthday party yesterday. This is my dining room table and my living room. I didn't have the guts to show you my bedroom. I don't have the energy to clean after yesterday so I think I'll wait and let the cleaning lady do it when she comes in 2 weeks. We'll have to eat in the bathroom until then. It's the only uncluttered room in the house.

I DID IT!

I just have to congratulate myself on throwing a successful party! Yup, I did it...well not all by myself. I think my entire family and even some of my friends played a part in making it a success. There was no way I could have done it by myself. 

Here are a ton of pictures...the really good ones were taken by Pam Booher. It is easy to spot them!!! They were so cute I had to steal them. 

Here are some highlights...The jumper was massive, barely fit in the yard and was AWESOME. Totally worth every penny. Everyone loved it including my husband and his brothers. Noah officially does not like sweets! Yup, the Nazi Health Food mother actually let her son have one bite of cake on his birthday even though it about gave me an anxiety attack. But, much to my delight, he said "No more, that's it" He didn't like it! Maia rocked her bikini and made everyone giggle. My 9 month pregnant friend jumped into the spa to save her son from going under. Noah's face while going down the slide. Noah's new ride which he drives with no fear nearly giving me a heart attack! 

Writer's Block

As you can probably tell, I am experiencing a case of Writer's Block this week. You see, I am a little overwhelmed with lots of work, planning Noah's last minute party, and watching very important reality television. I have not had time to pay attention to Maia's crazy tantrums, Noah's smart alec requests to go into time-out, or my kids' mountain of dirty clothes. Therefore, I do not have much to write about besides the fact that I am freaking out about the massive jumper thingy that we got for Noah's party not fitting in the in-laws backyard...oh and that I am going to be running all over town tomorrow like a chicken with its head cut off...

A Friendly Visit

My friend Breanne and I have been friends for about 7 or 8 years now and we have been fortunate enough to sort of go through life stages together. We got engaged and married around the same time, got pregnant with our first babies around the same time, moved churches around the same time, and had our second babies around the same time. It has been so much fun experiencing these things together, learning from each other, encouraging each other, and sometimes just knowing that I have a friend who is going crazy raising two babies just like me! 

 The other day, I realized that a friendly visit is definitely not what it used to be. You see, back before we had kids, I remember meeting Breanne at Starbucks for coffee and a nice peaceful chat. We would talk about what was going on in each other's lives and pray with each other and just feel encouraged after leaving. I felt like I knew her so much better after those conversations. Contrast that with this weekend's visit. I suggested getting together for dinner with the kids since both of our husbands were out of town. I made a casserole, packed up the kids and their luggage and headed over to her house. By the time I got to her door I was a ball of sweat, Maia was sliding down my hip and gripping onto my shirt for dear life, the diaper bag was knocking Noah in the head because I told him to stay close to me, and I was trying not to drop the casserole and keep it from Maia's curious fingers all at the same time. I said a breathless hello and dropped all my luggage to the floor including Maia. Let the chaos begin! Breanne got her two little ones up from their nap and brought out a million toys. Of course out of all the toys the boys wanted the same exact toy the entire evening. This meant that Breanne and I spent the evening disciplining and using the words "share" and time out" a lot. Maia became a vacuum cleaner eating any food remnants that Peyton would drop, pennies from Ethan's piggy bank, or lint. Peyton spent the night completely freaked out that I was going to steal her from her mommy and cried anytime Breanne walked away from her or I came close to her.  As you can imagine, this environment was not conducive to deep conversation. As soon as we would start talking about the joys or struggles in our lives, we'd have to break up a fight, pull a penny out of Maia's mouth, or pick up baby Peyton to get her to stop screaming. 

  After playing with the kids, feeding them dinner (and shoving dinner down our throats at lightning speed), giving them a bath, and cleaning up it was time for us to go. We packed  up our luggage and said good-bye. What a difference a few years makes! 

  On my drive home, when my babies were fast asleep in the backseat, I thanked the Lord for this stage in my life and for my friend Breanne. Even amidst all the chaos, I left encouraged and blessed by our friendship. Although, we had to scream to talk and were interrupted every two seconds it was a joy to be with a good friend whose life was in the same place mine is. We understood each other perfectly and were not offended when in mid-sentence one us would completely ignore the person who was talking to save a child from falling down the stairs! I think every mommy needs friendships like these for sanity and support.  Thanks Breanne!

All in a Day's Work

Today I...

Said good bye to my hubby who is leaving for the weekend and nearly had an anxiety attack thinking about being by myself with my munchkins for three full days. (I know I am a wuss) 

Burned my finger really bad when I closed my straightening iron on my pinky

Almost cut off my own hair because it is at the most awful in-between stage ever

Called my brother to come and help me this afternoon with the kids so that I could go grocery shopping and cook dinner without wanting to shoot myself! (Again, I know I am a wuss. I use all the help I can get!)

Put my kids to bed at 6:45 because I didn't want them to destroy my clean house. (Cleaning lady came today, woo hooo!)

Swore off ever buying a full chicken ever again no matter how great the price is because I found a few feathers still attached to it...GAG! 

Major Repercussions

Today, Noah wanted paper to write on and I couldn't find anything near me so I opened my journal (because it was the only thing within arm's length) to a blank page and handed it to him to keep him from writing on the floor or on the walls. He took it from me and said, "Oh thanks. Mommy's Bible. I color in mommy's Bible." Ummm...should I be worried? At first I thought it was cute that he associates my journal with  my Bible because whenever I read my Bible my journal is right next to me. However the reality of the situation is that my son thinks that my journal is the Bible, you know, The Word of God?! Do you realize that if I don't promptly correct this misconception, he could be scarred for life? I would hate for him to get to the stage where he can read and think that God wrote, "Noah is driving me absolutely crazy today. It's moments like these when I'd like to put him up for auction on Ebay. Lord, give me patience to deal with him today, keep my sanity, and keep him off the auction block." Ay yaiy yaiy...we are going to have a lesson tomorrow on the difference between mommy's journal and the Bible. 

Wordless Wednesday on Tuesday

Comfort Food for a Bad Mommy

Please hand over the half gallon of Chocolate Malted Crunch ice cream, the tub of chocolate covered raisins, and the box of milk chocolate molasses chips. I am just going to sit on the couch, eat until I am sick, and cry myself a river. Why? Let me tell you, but I have to ask ahead of time that you promise not to report me...Okay looks like we have a deal.

  The day started out wonderful. We went out to breakfast as a family and then took the kids for a bike ride through Bonelli park. It is beautiful outside today and we thought it would be perfect to spend the day outside. We fed the ducks and barely escaped an attack by a big mean goose but the kids were really enjoying themselves. Then we parked our bikes under a tree by the playground, set out a picnic blanket, and played with the kids on the slides. All was peaceful and fun until I saw a picture perfect moment with Maia and Ricky sitting on the blanket under the tree. I took out my camera to take a picture and right as I was about to snap the second one (the first one turned out blurry), I heard a THUMP behind me followed by a loud cry. My heart sank and I prayed. I ran to find Noah, standing with a face and mouth full of sand screaming. I picked him up and brought him over to Ricky. We checked him for broken bones and cleaned off his face. As Ricky was tending to him, I noticed Maia out of the corner of my eye chewing on something. I did a quick finger sweep of her mouth but found nothing. Oh well, I'd find it in her poop later. I turned back to Noah but was quickly distracted by Maia gagging. Oh shoot! She continued gagging and when I did another finger sweep, she got so mad that she cried until she turned blue. I freaked out and started running around and yelling, "Call 911"...okay not really but I felt like doing that!  Ricky flipped her over, patted her back and out of her mouth came half of a leaf. At this point we had two hysterical children, screaming to the high heavens because God had stuck them with these two idiots. I choked back my own tears as I watched Noah's face begin to swell and a huge bruise start to take form. He kept spitting out sand and he looked a little pale. I held him, watched him closely, asked Ricky a million times if he thought Noah was okay, and sang to calm him down. Ricky picked Maia up to keep her away from all the tasty foliage on the floor and watched to see if the other half of the leaf would make an appearance. 

  What started out as a wonderful day turned into the day when Ricky and Taleah would be escorted to jail for negligent parenting. I have managed to keep my tears to myself but know that they will come streaming out any second. I still have to do grocery shopping (for my comfort food) and I am a little nervous. I feel very unstable at the moment and if the checker lady tells me that I cannot use on of my coupons, I may have a melt down. 

  Since I am in the habit of bestowing awards on myself, I am going to award myself with the world's worst mommy of the day award. If you want to make me feel better, please leave your own worst mommy moment stories in the comments section. Thanks! 

Sheesh! I Can't Even Pretend

Because I work at a church, Sundays are a work day for me. I get up very early, go through my morning routine and then get picked up by my boss and his wife to go to church (it feels so weird to call them "my boss and his wife" because they are more like a second set of parents to me... however for the sake of this post, I will refer to him as my boss).

  Usually Sunday mornings are chaotic because I like to let Ricky sleep in but I try my best to put on my "I have it all under control" face by the time Chuck and Pam pick me up. Thus, I get myself ready, do my quiet time, get the kids out of bed, changed, fed, and settled for daddy by the time he wakes up. Then,  I glide out the door looking cool, calm, collected, professional, and ready to do my job when my boss picks me up. If you are a mom, you know that it is darn near impossible to do all this is in an hour and a half even when the kids are cooperative. It is VERY impossible when they are not being cooperative at all. Let me tell you how uncool, uncalm, and uncollected I was this morning...I couldn't even pretend.

  Of course my son woke up at 5:30 even though he is not supposed to be up until 7. This alone could have caused a break down on my part since he woke Maia up but I kept my cool and just told him and Maia that it was still dark outside which meant they had to go back to sleep. I got myself ready in record time (meaning my hair had to go yet another day without being washed) knowing that my the kids would not stay in their cribs much longer. As I was finishing up reading my Bible, Noah started yelling, "Mama, where aaaarrrre youuuuu." I went in to get the kids up and was greeted by two smiley faces and the strong sour smell of urine. Instead of Noah's usual "Hi Mama" greeting, I got "I'm all wet!" I felt his clothing and sure enough, he was soaked in pee. Then I noticed a bunch of white stuff all over his crib. He had peed so much that his nighttime diaper exploded. Great! Just what I need on a Sunday morning. I pulled him out keeping him at arms length, undressed him, gave him a wipey bath while he cried because it was so cold, and threw all of his bedding in the washing machine. Thank God Maia's diaper was still intact but her pajamas were pee soaked too. Why do my kids pee so much? I called to Ricky to get up because at this point I smelled like pee and I had two kids crying from their cold wipey baths and delay in their morning milk. Now that I think about it, I don't know why I had Ricky get up, he is not a morning person and thus is not very helpful in the mornings because he is still half asleep. Anyways, the rest of the my morning just got worse. Noah was cranky and whined about EVERYTHING from having to put his socks on to what he was having for breakfast to me having to leave. Maia fell and got a bruise on her head and almost bit Noah for the millionth time. Then, right as I was punishing Noah for being disobedient, my phone rang. Chuck and Pam were here and calling to let me know it. I could not get to my phone because both my children were screaming. I yelled for Ricky to come give me a hand as I headed for the stairs. Noah was clinging to my leg and getting snot all over my pants and Maia was speed army crawling for the stairs. I yelled again for Ricky to get the kids and re-dialed Chuck's phone number to let him know that I was on my way out the door. When he answered, I could barely hear him amidst the chaos in my house, I just yelled that I was on my way out the door and hung up as fast as I could. Ricky, sleepily came to my rescue and peeled my screaming children off of me and I ran out the door. 

  By the time I got in the car, I was flustered, irritated, and smelly (not only did I smell like urine but I realized I had forgotten to put deodorant on as well). My secret was out. There was no pretending I had it all together for my boss after he'd just received a phone call where I yelled in his ear over the sound of two screaming children, the smell of urine invaded his car as I entered it, and he could see the big wet snot spot on my pant leg. My secret was out...I am anything but cool, calm, collected, and professional. I am a flustered mother of 2 babies on the verge of insanity and there is no hiding that. 

Unfit Mother #2

I wrote a post awhile back questioning whether or not I'd be considered an unfit mother. After this past week, I think I would definitely fall under the unfit mother category. Here is why...

I found a sticker in Maia's poop yesterday. You know the stickers that you peel off fresh fruit? She is my automatic vacuum cleaner consuming whatever she finds on my floors and I am obviously oblivious.

I just now sent out an evite for Noah's birthday party which is in 2 weeks and which I still have not planned. I am hoping that it comes together though.

Maia has a super bad diaper rash because she sat in that sticker poop for at least an hour and a half before I noticed she had pooped. 

I forgot to pack diapers for the kids when they went to their grandma's house for the day on Thursday and she had to go and buy diapers for them.

Noah has a big bruise on his face and I don't really know how it got there. All I know is that he screamed from his crib when he was supposed to be taking a nap and when I walked in I saw a huge bruise. 

Noah is terrified of his sister when they sit down and play with toys together because she bites him if she thinks her toys are in danger of being taken by him. 

I made both of my kids sit in their high chairs for an hour while I did household chores the other day. I just kept feeding them food when they would cry. I was determined to do the dishes and the laundry. 

Maia is chewing on my dirty shoes right now and I am not stopping her because I want to blog instead. 

Picture of the Month

This is what happens when you let your younger brother watch your son for a few minutes while you give your daughter a bath. 

P.S. If you click on the picture, you can see larger version of my son's tongue and crazy hair! 

Recipe Post

Since I have now been crowned "Top Chef" by yours truly (me), and have had so many requests (2) for my enchilada "on the fly" casserole recipe, I've decided to give you all the recipe that brought me my title.

Ready made Rotisserie chicken from the store or if you are not lazy like me then you can boil a whole chicken or just chicken breasts. 

Shredded chedder and jack cheese

1 small can of diced Ortega green chilis

1 large can of Las Palmas red or green Enchilada sauce

Corn tortillas 

Canola oil

one of those long glass pyrex dishes 

Shred the chicken and mix the green chilis in and put aside

Heat oil in a pan and fry the tortillas very lightly. You do not want them crispy. Once they are done cut them into long strips

Line the bottom of the pyrex dish with the tortilla strips

Put a layer of chicken on top of the tortillas then put a generous amount of cheese on top of that. 

Pour enchilada sauce over all of it. Then repeat the layers: tortillas, chicken, cheese, sauce

Bake in oven at 350 degrees for 30 minutes. 

As you can tell, I have NO experience in giving recipes. I am new to this Top Chef position and have not been trained in the recipe giving department and the proper terminology. Good Luck...and don't blame me if it turns out awful. 

Dinner Fiasco

I'd like to start this post like I start a lot of my posts: giving myself a pat on the back. Yup, I am proud of myself because I kept my cool and ended up with a successful plan B when plan A was burned...

Our neighbors have become really good friends of ours and tonight was our second time having them over for dinner. I planned way in advance to make BBQ beef sandwiches because I'd had a roast in the freezer for awhile that was too big for just my family so it was perfect for me to cook for guests. I put it in the crock pot this morning and set it on high to cook all day while I was at work. It would be ready to serve as soon as I got home at 5:00. I left Ricky with a grocery list so that he could stop at the market for side dishes on his way home from his route and I left for work. I was so proud of myself for finally using my crock pot and I was excited for our friends to come join us for dinner.

 As soon as I got home, I went to check on  the roast. The recipe I read online said to cook it for 10 hours so I knew it would be perfect by the time I got home. I lifted the crock pot lid and was instantly hit with an unpleasant smell. The edges of the roast looked quite crispy and the BBQ sauce was black, bubbly, and stuck to the sides of the crock pot. Then I tore into it with a fork to see if maybe the middle could be salvaged. It was dry as a desert. The panic started to set in as  realized our guests would be arriving in 30 minutes and all I had to serve them was dry burnt BBQ beef sandwiches. I looked at Ricky, suppressed the panic welling up within me and calmly stated that we needed a Plan B. He began to twitch nervously. I opened and closed the refrigerator, freezer, and pantry doors about 30 times looking for something to whip up in 30 minutes. For some reason I thought something would magically appear if I looked in the cupboard or refrigerator one more time. Nothing appeared. After tossing around a bunch of mediocre ideas, I finally put my foot down and decided to make an "on the fly" enchilada casserole. I texted our guests asking the to come over an hour later,  sent Ricky to the market again, put Maia down in her crib, stuck Noah in front of the T.V., and started working with what I had. I tried my best to ignore the angry cries coming from Maia's room (she was a little upset that I was making her sleep during her dinner time...she was really hungry). The more she cried and the more the minutes ticked by, the more my anxiety grew and threatened to rear it's ugly head in the form of me pulling my hair out and yelling like a mad woman while running down the street. To make matters worse, Noah decided that he didn't want to stay put in front of the t.v.. He wanted to loudly tell me that Maia was awake and crying and be in my way sweeping with my broom. So, while I was frantically frying tortillas and shredding chicken, Noah was knocking me in the head with the broom that was much to heavy for his little frame. I took a deep breath willed myself to be calm and politely urged him to use the small broom and sweep the dining area instead. He complied. Ricky returned with the groceries, I finished putting my casserole together, and stuck it in the oven. I put an end to Maia's screaming by getting her out of her crib and feeding her and then giving her the quickest bath ever. Right as I was finishing putting her pajamas on, the timer went off and the doorbell rang. Of course Ricky was in the middle of changing Noah's poop so neither of us could get the door. He quickly finished the diaper change and ran to get the door. I am sure we made a great impression. Noah greeted them half naked (shirt, socks, and a half fastened diaper), and I greeted them flushed and sweaty with my hair in my face and a crying baby on my hip. I just hope that they didn't notice the sweat beads on my forehead dripping into the casserole as I pulled it out of the oven. I said a quick prayer, begging God to let it taste good despite the fact that it was made under much stress with little sweat in it.

He answered my prayer! They loved my enchilada casserole and even asked for the recipe...Now I need a glass of wine and a massage...

Sleep, please come back!

One of my favorite times of the day is when my kids take a nap in the afternoon. My sanity relies on that nap time (I've realized that my sanity rests on a few specific things/times in my day). It is the time of day when I get to read, blog, clean up, etc. I usually have that 2 to 2 and half hours very planned out. I know exactly what I am going to do with that time. However this past weekend my kids have tested the strength of my sanity by ruining nap time. They have thrown a wrench in the routine and have refused to sleep. For two days, they both talked to each other for an hour and a half before I gave up. The next day I decided to put them down one at a time. I waited for one to fall asleep then I put the other one down, that didn't work either. Today, I tried that again but with the opposite child. Here I am an hour and a half later listening to Maia talk very loudly in her crib and praying that Noah stays asleep despite Maia's loud chatter. I cannot do my normally planned out routine because I am on the verge of an anxiety attack begging God to keep Noah asleep and please let Maia finally fall asleep. But, I know exactly what will happen. Noah is going to wake up as soon as Maia falls asleep. I will have got nothing done and will be in a bad mood because I didn't get anything done on my list of things to do during nap time. Arrrgghhhh! This is why I am begging God for a bigger house where my kids can have their own rooms and Maia can chat to her little heart's content during nap time because she will be in a separate room and I won't have to worry about Noah waking up. 

So much for doing my laundry. The unpacked suitcases will have to stay put for another week and I will have to resort to wearing clothes dug out of my hamper and sprayed down with Febreeze for one more week. Nap time, pleeeeeeeease go back to normal. I don't want to go to the nut house!!! 

Losing an Hour = Chaos

To Whom It May Concern:

The events of today lead me to believe that the day we lose an hour is the most evil day of the year. I am begging you to please discontinue this time change for the well being of my family. 

This morning I woke up tired due to the lost hour of sleep and my son woke up 1 hour earlier than normal which led to a huge interruption in my morning routine. My sanity rests on me getting my "quiet time" with the Lord in the mornings. This morning my "quiet time" was anything but quiet because Noah's internal clock was off.  During my "quiet time"he was commenting every two seconds; "Mama is reading her Bible. Noah leave her alone. I watch Thomas the Train?" Needless to say I could not concentrate. 

  Once my daughter woke up, she was also out of sorts and bit Noah twice leaving teeth marks and a bruise on his little leg. I know it had nothing to do with Noah stealing her toys and everything to do with losing an hour. As if the lost hour hadn't done enough damage, Noah threw an embarrassing tantrum at church, causing everyone to stare at the us as we made our way to the parking lot. I am sure that they had sympathy on us understanding the horrible effects of an hour lost as they watched us drag our hysterical, snot drenched 2 year old past them. 

  When I got home to my disaster of a house, I looked around and thought, if only I had that hour back I would have time to straighten up this mess, but since that hour is gone, I only have time to blog. What a shame.

 So, I implore you to please adopt the philosophy and time change practices of Arizona. Just leave the time the same year around. If you did, I am sure my mornings would all be peaceful, my kids would be well-behaved, and house would be clean and organized. 

Sincerely,

 

Mrs. Looking For Any Excuse

I'm Baaaaack!

Okay, so I have returned fro my trip to Arizona! My kids are still alive and Ricky is still sane. Praise the Lord! 

 Upon my return I discovered that Maia wore the same outfit all three days I was gone, Noah wore the same outfit 2 of the days I was gone. Ricky decided to do the kids' laundry which means there are piles of clean clothes scattered all over my house (he does not fold laundry...it's against his religion!).  The refrigerator and cupboards are empty, Maia is wearing diapers that are much too big for her because we are out of her size diapers, and I have no clean clothes. 

  While at my conference we had a wonderful speaker named Donna Otto. She inspired me to get my home life organized and in order and gave me very practical tips on how to accomplish this. Last night I was ready to get home and get organized. Today, after looking at all the mess, I've changed my mind. I think I'll make myself some really old pasta that I found in the very back of the cupboard, eat it plain since there is nothing to put on it, make a pathway to my room amidst the clean and dirty laundry and my 2 unpacked suitcases, and take a nice nap while the kids sleep. Maybe when I wake up my house will magically have organized itself!!!

Freaking Out

So, I feel like my life is going a million miles per minute and I can't slow it down! I just got back from a 3 day trip and now I am leaving on another one. I am headed to a conference for work tomorrow and will be returning on Thursday.  I feel like I am abandoning my children! They are going to wonder why the heck mommy keeps leaving them! Maybe I should tell them that if they behave themselves I would stay put. Okay, but really, I am freaking out. Maia is my new vacuum cleaner, as she army crawls throughout my house, she picks up all crumbs, lint, dirt, and whatever else her little fingers can pick up and puts it in her mouth. I've had to make two extractions today. What if she does this when I am not around to make the extraction? What if, what if, what if??? I need to stop thinking about all those what ifs or I'll drive myself crazy. I've prepared the kids' meals for all three days and Ricky's too and I've given Ricky  the run down of all my mommy instructions. Now, I have to trust him, go on my trip, and enjoy my 3 days without my kids. How many times have I dreamt of three days without the kids? Just today, in the midst of a Noah tantrum and a Maia melt down I said, "I can't wait to go on my trip!" I just need to take myself back to that place every time I start to worry and I'll be okay! 

This is SERIOUS!

Let me start from the beginning...my husband loves to go to Glamis. If you don't know what Glamis is, picture desert and sand dunes as far as the eye can see. Then picture a whole bunch of people with ridiculously expensive toys (if liquidated could solve world hunger). Now add in a lot of beer. This is Glamis. For the past few years my husband has been trying to convince me that if I just gave it a chance and took a trip with him to Glamis, I would really love it. I kept telling him that dirt, ridiculously expensive toys, and crazy drunk people is really not my thing and refused to go. Finally, this last weekend he convinced me to go. I agreed because we'd be going with our good friends Eddie and Jen who I love and who are not drinkers!  

  Here was my husband's plan: We drop the kids off at my parents on Thursday night and meet up with Eddie and Jen at about 9:30 p.m. in Glamis (They would arrive about 2 hours ahead of us). We'd set up camp in the motor home and then take the sand rail out for a night run, come back, play some card games, and go to sleep. After a good night's sleep, we'd go for a morning ride and then go back to camp and wait for the rest of the crew to get there and hang out.  

  Here is what actually happened. When I took the kids to my parent's house, my mom was not there, and I didn't pack any dinner for them because my mom said she would cook for them. They were starving, she was late, and Ricky was super irritated because he was so excited for this trip that I was going to absolutely love and he could not wait a minute longer to get the trip started. We waited around for my mom while I apologized profusely to Ricky for my mom's tardy nature and tried to keep Noah's mind off of his growling stomach. Once she arrived, Noah decided to be rude and we spent another whole 20 minutes trying to teach him a lesson before we left. Finally we headed out. About half way there, we receive a call from Jen informing us that the motor home was stuck in the sand. Ricky didn't seem too worried about it so I figured it was no big deal and once Ricky got there, he and Eddie would fix the problem and we'd be good to go. WRONG! 

  When we got there the motor home was a little tilted because the right rear tire was stuck in the sand. Ricky and Eddie spent the next 3 hours (9:30p.m. to 12:30 a.m.) trying to dig the tires out and getting the motor home much more stuck than it was before. I was deliriously tired but could not go to sleep because the motor home was at a severe angle and every 20 minutes or so I would wake up to another fruitless attempt to drive the motor home out of its predicament. At 12:30 some other Glamis goers who had been watching us the entire time from a distance decided to make their way over to us. They came over and made discussed our situation with our boys while laughing and taking swigs out of their liquor flasks. Jen and I were in the motor home, praying that they would offer to rescue us. Then I heard these words from one of the nice neighbors, "Well if it gets serious, let us know and we'll pull our heavy duty truck over here and pull you guys right out. Alright, good luck. Bye!" At this point, I lost it. I turned to Jen inside the motor home and in my harshest whisper I ranted, "WHAT? What do you mean, 'If it gets serious?' Does this not look serious to you? Our motor home is nearly tipping over because it is so deep in the sand, it is sitting in a trench from all the digging that the boys have done, and you have been watching them work on it for the past 3 hours. How much more SERIOUS does it get? Bring your truck over here NOW. This is SERIOUS!" My ranting to Jen accomplished absolutely nothing. The boys dug for another hour and made matters worse and then we all resigned to sleeping at a 45 degree angle and trying our best to defy gravity and stay on the beds. 

 The next morning, we were all exhausted and were all experiencing a bit of vertigo. But, our nice hung-over neighbors came and pulled us out of our trench while we (and a bunch of other spectators) cheered! We thought things would all go up hill from there but we had another thing coming. The sand rail broke down. That thing is super expensive so for it to break down would put anyone in a bad mood, and it also meant that I would have nothing to ride in while in Glamis. To make matters worse, we could not find a decent spot to park the motor home in so we just sat on the side of the road in with a broken sand rail and sulked for a couple of hours until the rest of our party showed up.  Once they all got there the rest of the trip was not so bad and even had it's really fun moments but this was definitely not the trip Ricky had dreamed up for me that would make me love Glamis. Maybe I will try again next year once I am over the trauma from this year's trip.

Notice how the motor home is at a slant and how it is actually touching the sand. That is NOT supposed to happen.

 

The trench we left after we were rescued. Those our the nice peeps who helped us! 

This is Ricky's version of heaven. (before it broke)

Awww memories!